Image courtesy of Google
By Llerraj Esuod
"You know what makes me unhappy (what's that?) When brothas make babies and leave a young mother to be a pappy."
--Tupac Shakur
Some mini men believe their possession of a mustache, a beard, a dick and a pair of balls makes them a man. And for them, fathering children becomes oddly synchronous to D.A.D.D.Y.hood.
This faulty thinking leaves many a child aching for what mini men are incapable of delivering because D.A.D.D.Y.hood requires more than the biological use of a dick. Becoming a D.A.D.D.Y. goes beyond arousal, engorgement and engaging pussy. It goes beyond planting his seed in the would-be mother’s ovum.
Far-too-often men see fathering a child as some manhood milestone. And while there is some joy to be felt from that action, it is diminished when there is no action beyond ejaculation.
Losers.
It takes little effort to become a father. The title is ascribed the moment his child is born, but being a dad requires that he ensconce himself in sweat and emotional equity.
As Toni Morrison put it, "A father can say, 'Boy, fend for yourself,' which means, 'Don't show me up; hurry up and fail.' Or he can say, 'I'll teach you the world,' which means, 'I'm scared to death of you.'"
This kind of abandonment and vile manipulation is the stuff dreams of patricide are made of. The lack of paternal care and unwarranted cowardice can result in the child’s visceral response to feeling unknown by someone who should know them well.
“Why doesn't my father spend time with me?" "Why doesn't he call me?" "Why doesn't he love me?" "Why does he hate me?" "Why?! Why?! Why?!"
The emotional and mental scar tissue runs deeper when the sperm donor lives up the street or across the bridge or around the corner. The proximity confounds his absence making true peace and healing through re-connection, repair and remodeling even more convoluted.
Pops is a real Walkaway Joe.
Conversely, a dad engages in meaningful dialogue with his children and wants to teach them the world. A dad wants his children's life to be better than his and even if he slacks financially, his desires for them remains evident.
An involved dad likens his love for his children as the Lord does his flock in Romans 8:38-39. For Dad is "persuaded that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things to come; Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate him from the love of his [children]."
Even future dads are already in love with the son or daughter he has not yet met but anticipates.
Father’s only fuck. D.A.D.D.Y's do all deeds diligently year-round.
--Rebel Writes
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